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Updated: Aug 23, 2021

Sunday, June 27th, 2021

Captain’s Log

It’s been an exciting week aboard the S.S Shit Show, as we officially have two high schoolers now.

The Duchess graduated grade 8 on Thursday not only with honours but the following day was awarded the school’s Leadership and Compassion award. I’m not going to lie, I cried. Most of those tears were from pride but a few were shed due to the Mom guilt I felt for not being there to see her receive it. Number 2 and I were at work on Friday when the awards were handed out online. I am thankful that Relic was here to watch the online ceremony with his sister and made sure to cheer as loud and embarrassingly as I would have. When I asked the Duchess what the award meant she responded with an “I don’t know”. Thankfully Relic was happy to fill us in on all the details. She’s also graduated this week from teenage infancy to terrible teens. She’s reverted back to being a picky eater living solely on snack foods and rage. Her sleep habits have also changed resulting in increased crankiness and a refusal to nap has left the rest of us feeling it. Her attitude is also up significantly and the eye roll has been replaced with the formidable side eye.

Relic also received high praise this week after handing in a stellar report card and completed grade 11 with an average in the high 80s. His commitment to online learning was amazing and I am so proud of how much effort was made. Our goal for summer vacation is for him to continue his enthusiasm and perhaps focus on keeping his room clean. I am still not convinced there isn’t wildlife residing under his bed, living off the empty chip bags and cereal bowls.

It’s been such a trying time that It almost feels shameful to admit to the tremendous success that my children have experienced this past school year when I know so many struggled. But I can’t help myself, I am the proudest Captain. Extra T.P rations for the entire crew this week, this was a team win.

Not wanting the Crew to be overconfident in their recent success Number 2 and I felt it pertinent to ensure they remember who was in charge of this ship. Especially after Relic came home last night having enjoyed himself a bit too much in his celebrations. Annoyed as we were by his complete inability to pretend to be sober, we determined that some lessons could be learned at a later date. We wish him good night and let him head to bed lecture-free. The next morning however Number 2 ensured to wake him up nice and early to enjoy some digging of holes in the hot humid sun. It was a beautiful parenting moment, no lectures were needed.

The Duchess enjoyed an equally late evening last night on Facetime and was far more vocal about her feelings toward family fun chore time. She made sure in no uncertain terms to express her full displeasure over having to weed the garden with me. I praised her for using her voice and speaking up but reminded her that until she pays the bills, she weeds the veggie gardens.

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