Tuesday, February 20th, 2024
Captain's Log
The long weekend brought its share of excitement to our household. Relic, enjoying his reading week break, made his grand entrance on Friday afternoon. Within a mere three hours of his return, he managed to ransack the pantry, marvelling at our apparent wealth with comments like, "When did we become the kind of family that has three kinds of Bubly at once?" and "OMG, there's so much food here!" This left me in stitches, considering that just 15 minutes earlier, the Duchess had stormed through the kitchen, proclaiming, "We literally have no good food in this house!" Ah, the stark contrast between a broke university student's perception of a fully stocked pantry and that of a teenage sister still luxuriating in the financial support of her parents. Nothing like a little sibling rivalry to start the long weekend.
After depositing his laundry and commandeering my car keys, Relic set sail for a night of revelry with his motley crew. Despite his brief shore leave, he did manage to carve out some quality time with his senior officers (me, his mother). On Saturday, despite only getting a few short hours of sleep and a headache he did spend the day with me. I dragged him through grocery shopping. For not complaining too badly I rewarded him with a trip through McDonald’s drive-through and pretended to believe it when he said after he was going to his room to “study”.
After his nap, Relic launched a cunning campaign to dethrone the dog as the favourite child by cooking me dinner and washing the dishes as he worked. His efforts have certainly earned him extra T.P. rations. However, I think it’s more appropriate to commend Number 2 and myself for our spectacular parenting skills, as evidenced by raising such a thoughtful and considerate offspring. I nearly spit out my wine in disbelief as I wrote these words, but it's the undeniable truth!
Sunday saw us rising at the ungodly hour of 4 am to ensure Relic made it to the airport on time, as he was off to Kelowna to visit his girlfriend. Despite our best efforts to be punctual, we found ourselves marooned atop a snowbank, thanks to one of my ill-fated shortcuts. Number 2 (my ever-reliable second-in-command) came to our rescue, thankfully we had barely made it more than a KM from home. I may have had to apologize to Relic as he did he suggested that due to the weather perhaps we should not go the way I planned. Despite all the setbacks we got him there on time and he had a great flight.
Putting his newly acquired skills from his communications major and charmed the couple sitting next to him to buy him snacks on the airplane. I don’t know how he does it, Nevertheless, this is completely on brand for him.
Meanwhile, the Duchess continues to bask in the glory of her teenage existence, even if she occasionally grumbles about our family activities. Our Family Day was a delightful exercise in parental sadism, as we forced our offspring to enjoy quality time with us on the slopes.
In a new twist, I've taken to sending my family inspirational self-help-quotes, much to their chagrin. Their collective eye-rolling brings a warm glow to my heart.
Lastly, I must confess to a parenting faux pas: I've been guilty of ignoring my family members when I'm preoccupied. The Duchess, in her infinite wisdom, called me out for my habit of leaving her on "heard" while I was mindlessly doom-scrolling. Guilty as charged, but in my defence, multitasking is not my forte. It's not the only critique she's had for me this week. She also made sure to let me know how "outdated" I was when I offered up a suggestion for her room. Ah, the joys of navigating the ever-changing tides of teenage trends!
Until next time, may your days be filled without having to ask twice, your pantries full, and your family adventures memorable (even if they're sometimes against their will).
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